Table for One

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Over the last few months I was let go from a job, started a new job, and I moved into my own apartment just to name a few of the changes.My life has been a little bit tumultuous to say the least so last weekend I decided to take myself on a date to the Keg.

Ready for my date at the Keg
Ready for my date at the Keg

The idea of purposefully going to a restaurant to eat a meal by myself gives me a lot of anxiety because I always feel like people are wondering if i got stood up on a date or something like that. The only time I ever really eat at a restaurant when I’m by myself is when I’m travelling and then it’s usually get in and out so I can continue sight seeing. My boyfriend, on the other hand, has absolutely no problem going to a restaurant by himself and he does it fairly regularly so I figured it can’t be that bad. I have been going to counselling over the last year and a big thing they emphasize is self-care so I thought this would be a good exercise in self-care and to push the boundaries of my comfort zone.

I decided to go to the Keg because after a long 2 weekends of moving and cleaning I felt like I deserved a steak. I got dressed up, did my hair and make up like I was going out with someone and set off on my date. It was totally fine until I actually opened the door and walked up to the hostess and said ‘table for one’. At this point the voice in my head screamed ‘what are you doing?! They’re going to think it’s weird!!’ I tamped it down and went to my table, I sat in the lounge so I was able to enjoy the Stamps game with dinner.

Once my server came over and I ordered my food I calmed down a lot. I decided to fully treat myself and got an appy, an entree, and dessert so I would be able to (a kind of forced) to sit there and enjoy the food instead of dashing in and out like I normally do. I tried to put my phone away and eat mindfully to enjoy the food while watching the game. The server was great and I definitely did not feel awkward until someone new sat at the table beside me. Then I returned to the ‘they are totally wondering why I’m here PSX_20160902_100930alone’ self talk but I tried to keep reminding myself they probably didn’t notice me and if they did then they probably didn’t care that I was alone.

As the saying goes, the best things happen outside your comfort zone. I’m glad I took myself on a date and I think it showed me self-care in a different way. Self-care is usually broken down into sleep, nutrition, and exercise and is often described as a way to show self-love. I think I typically sleep, eat, and exercise well so for me self-care has been more about treating myself to things that I don’t normally do because I don’t want to spend money on myself. I would like to get into a routine of taking myself out once or twice a year. I feel like I wimped out a little bit by sitting in the lounge instead of in the upstairs dining room so maybe that will be an extra challenge for next time.

What activities do you use for self-care?

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